Guardian Angel
by SomethingAboutAllison
Summary: 19-year-old Austin Moon lives with his parents and his 6-month-old baby sister, Amanda. But when tragedy strikes his family, Austin is forced to make some tough decisions and grow up fast. With the help of his roommate/nanny Ally, he learns what it really means to have your life together. AU, somewhat OOC.
1. New Beginnings

**A/N: Hi there. So this is a new continuing story that I'll be working on. I'm pretty excited for this, and I hope you guys read! Also, I got a twitter that I'm dedicating 100% to Auslly/Raura fangirling, so follow me and I will definitely follow back! **

** /_lolor5**

**Thanks guys! Enjoy and let me know what you think!**

* * *

I shouldn't be this nervous. I really shouldn't. It's not like it's a date or anything. I'm just meeting with someone who wants to be Amanda's nanny. No big deal.

When my parents died a month ago, I knew this was going to have to happen. I mean, I'm only 19 years old. I'm working at a diner and living at home trying to save up for my own apartment in LA. Before the accident, I had a good life, living with my mom, dad, and 6-month-old sister Amanda. But when the car accident took both my parents away, I became responsible for taking care of my baby sister. I mean, sure, I could've put her up for adoption. That was an option that was presented to me. But I love Amanda. I didn't want to lose her. So I decided that I could be her guardian.

Right after my parents died, the house felt too quiet for me. Too empty. I decided I needed a roommate, but that idea evolved into me needing a nanny. I would let them live in the house for free if they helped with the baby. I put out an ad and got a response. A response named Ally Dawson. And that Ally Dawson was coming over to meet me in three minutes.

I knew a little bit about Ally. I had e-mailed her, and she said she was 20 years old and worked at a music store in the mall. She seemed sweet when I talked to her, but I wanted to meet her in person to make sure she wasn't a serial killer. You know. Just in case.

The doorbell rings, followed by a little trill of knocking. Ally. I fix my hair in the mirror before opening the door.

"Hi, you must be Austin," greets the small brunette on my doorstep. She's wearing a flowy blue dress with tiny white flowers on it. Her chestnut hair is curled and falling along her shoulders. She's smiling sweetly and she smells like perfume. She's _really_ beautiful. Really.

"Yeah, uh, I am, I'm Austin Moon, and you must be Ally Dawson," I manage, shaking her hand and smiling widely. I move out of the doorway and motion for her to come in and sit down in the living room.

Ally's eyes dart over the room briefly before her attention focuses on the playpen near the couch. "Hi Amanda," she coos softly to the baby sitting in the playpen, playing with a stuffed animal. She giggles and continues playing with her toys.

"Do you want to hold her?" I ask Ally. She nods. I reach down into the playpen and pick Amanda up. I carefully transition her into Ally's arms.

Amanda looks up at Ally and they smile at each other. I'm not going to lie, it's adorable.

"She really likes you," I comment as Ally sways with Amanda. Ally smiles at me and takes a seat on the couch, placing the baby on her lap.

"Kids tend to like me," she says with a smile. God, that _smile. _She's so real.

"So have you taken care of kids before?" I ask in an attempt to get some sort of interview or conversation going.

"Yeah," she replies, "I mean I used to babysit in high school, and at the music store I teach little kids piano. So I'm with kids a lot."

I nod. "That's good. You're good with babies?"

She smiles. "That I am."

"Good," I reply. I take a second to watch Ally and Amanda interacting. Amanda has a death grip on Ally's index finger, but the brunette doesn't seem to mind. She's smiling and rubbing Amanda's tummy with her thumb, making Amanda coo and smile. _So_ adorable.

"You said she was 7 months?" Ally asks.

"Mmhmm. She's getting pretty big," I muse. Ally smiles, then her face hardens a little.

"She's...not yours, right?" Ally asks carefully. I mean, it's a valid question. It's more than physically possible for me to have fathered a 7-month-old baby. Seven months ago I was 19. Totally possible.

"No, uh, she's my sister. But don't feel bad for asking. I get dirty looks in public from old people all the time," I assure her. She giggles.

"Where are your parents?" she asks. I heart drops, but I pick it back up slowly.

"They, um...they were in a car accident a month ago, they both passed away," I answer quickly, willing the tears to stay inside, trying to swallow the all-too-familiar lump in my throat.

Ally's face drops. "Austin...I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's fine," I reply quickly, a little sharper than I had meant to sound, "it's not your fault for asking. You didn't know."

She pushes a lock of ombré hair behind her ear. "My parents are both gone too," she offers quietly.

I nod. "I'm sorry," slips out in a chaste whisper.

She shakes her head. "It's fine. My mom died when I was a little girl, my dad a few years ago," she explains. She takes a deep breath. "But, enough about me, huh? Do you want to show me the room?" she asks, turning her mouth up into a smile.

I nod and smile gently. She picks up Amanda and carries her while I lead her through the kitchen and up the stairs to where the bedrooms are.

"So this is my room, sorry that it's kind of, uh, kind of messy," I stutter. I am actually pretty embarrassed at the disheveled state of my room. I mentally chide myself for not cleaning up better.

She giggles. "It's fine. Your room is kind of cute, despite the fact that it's not baby-proofed whatsoever," she remarks.

I roll my eyes. "Don't worry, Mrs. Safety, Amanda's not allowed in here. Speaking of the baby, here's her room," I say, motioning to the nursery across the hall. The nursery is a small room with light pink walls and white carpeting. There are doodley images of little teddy bears in ballet tutus on the wall. Amanda has a white crib with a frilly pink mattress and pink woven blankets. In the corner, there is a white wooden rocking chair where my mother used to rock her and feed her. There is a dresser that is too big for Amanda's tiny clothes and a chair full of stuffed animals that are about as big as Amanda is.

Ally flashes a wide smile as her eyes glance over the room. "It's adorable," she muses. Amanda squeals and reaches her arms out towards the chair full of stuffed animals. Ally picks up a little stuffed zebra and hands it to Amanda. She coos with delight and clutches the animal's foot in her teeny hand.

"Yeah, my parents wanted to spoil her a little." My tone is almost reminiscent. I shake my head and smile at Ally. "Do you want to see your room?"

"That'd be great," she replies graciously. I lead her down the hall a little, past the bathroom and the linen closet, to the bare room that used to belong to my parents.

"Here it is. Bedroom, closet, and you have a master bathroom in there too," I say, showing her the room.

She looks around and blinks a few times. "This was your parent's room," she observes quietly.

I nod. Amanda's getting a little fussy, so I take her carefully out of Ally's arms.

"You'd just let a stranger sleep in this room?" she asks incredulously.

I exhale. "Yeah, I mean, I guess. But I'm not thinking of it that way. It's just a room. New beginnings, ya know?"

She gives this kind of crooked grin, like she can't believe what I'm saying, but she still likes it. "You're brave," she remarks.

I smile. "I'm really not, but I'm glad you think that," I reply.

She shakes her head. "My dad's room looks exactly the same as it did two and a half years ago," she admits quietly, looking down at her feet.

I have never felt more sorry in my life. "It's okay," I whisper softly. Amanda shifts around in my arms.

"It's fine," Ally whispers. Is that...a smile on her face? I return my attention to my sister.

"I would really love to move in here, and take care of Amanda," she remarks.

I immediately smile at this. "That's great, Ally! You're...just the girl I was looking for."

She looks up at me with soft caramel eyes.

_Just _the girl.

* * *

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	2. Learning

"Shh, I know honey, I know..." I soothe Amanda. It's 9:30 in the morning, and she's hungry. I'm making her some mashed bananas for breakfast.

Ally is coming over later, and she's bringing her stuff. Starting to move in. We got all the technical stuff out of the way last time she was here, which was about a week ago. She seemed really excited about moving in, which is a good sign. And of course, Amanda loves her.

I finish mashing bananas for my sister, who's sitting in her high chair playing with a cloth book. I gently pull the book away from her so I can feed her. I let her have a few tries at feeding herself, and while most of the food ends up on the tray, she's getting better at using a spoon. It's crazy how fast she's growing up.

Ally is due to come over at noon, so I have about two hours to get ready, and to get the house ready. I want to take some of my parents' stuff out of their old room, to make space for Ally's things. I put the boxes of clothes and pictures in the empty closet in Amanda's room.

I clean up the room for Ally, dusting, vacuuming, and taking things out that aren't hers. By the time I'm done, it's almost noon. I get dressed and wait for Ally, who comes right on time.

I see her car and go outside to help her. "Hey Ally," I greet as she rummages around the trunk. She looks up at me and smiles.

"Hi," she says softly, pulling a box full of bedding out of her car.

"Let me help you with that," I offer, pulling the box out of the trunk and carrying it towards the door. She follows close behind with a smaller box.

A beat passes. "How's Amanda?" Ally asks as we walk in the door.

I nod. "She's great. Teething a little, but she's handling it well," I reply.

Ally smiles. "That's good," she replies. We go out to the car and get the rest of her stuff. After sorting through it in the living room, we go up to her room to start putting it together. I make up her bed, while she works on stocking the closet with her clothes. Her sheets smell like fabric softener and a little bit of sweet perfume.

We talk as we make her room up, a little bit about my life but mostly about hers. I learn that she's working at her dad's music store part time while getting her online degree from MUNY, occasionally going to classes at a satellite campus in Orlando. She used to live on campus in New York, but she moved back to take over Sonic Boom when her dad died and continued schooling online.

Eventually the conversation moves more towards personal life. "Do you have a boyfriend?" I ask her as I stuff a pillow into a pillowcase.

She takes a deep breath. "I do," she answers, and it sounds almost like an apology.

I nod, trying not to let my disappointment show. I mentally chide myself for even thinking someone as sweet and beautiful as Ally would be available. "What's he like?" I ask, because it seems like a natural thing to say.

She smiles. "Well his name is Dallas, and we met after I graduated high school and we've been dating ever since. He works for his dad's accounting firm, he's really smart," she replies.

I can't help but notice how unemotional her description is, but I don't ask her about it. I don't need to know. "That's cool," I reply hempenly.

"Yeah," she breathes, trying to shove a box of books onto the top shelf of the closet.

"Here, let me help, I offer, taking the other side of the box. Being taller and stronger than her, it's easy for me to lift the box up and nestle it onto the shelf.

"Thanks, Austin," she says quietly as we're left standing just a little too close.

"No problem," I respond with a smile. I want to say something else, but the words are caught in my throat and I can't find anything to say. I'm about to say something when I hear Amanda start crying.

"I'll go see what she wants," Ally offers, but I put my hand on her shoulder.

"I can take care of her, you have setting up to do in here still." I can't help but notice how smooth her skin is, and how soft her hair is, and how pink her lips are...

She smiles. "Thanks," she offers as she returns to organizing the closet.

"No problem," I respond before rushing off to Amanda's room.

Amanda's in her crib, I greet her as I go to pick her up and cuddle her.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" I ask. Nothing visibly wrong with her, probably just hungry, teething, or a dirty diaper.

She cries as I pick her up. I can barely make it out, but it's there, under the surface. "Ma...ma...mama!"

Dealing with an infant's tears is even more difficult when you're trying to deal with your own.

* * *

Obviously I knew that Ally was going to be living with me, but it was still a bit of an adjustment. I've never lived with anyone other than my family, so living with someone I barely knew is a little weird. I don't know if she drinks coffee in the morning, I don't know what kind of shampoo she uses, I don't even know what kind of bread she wants me to buy. To be honest, having a live-in nanny is a little awkward.

It wouldn't be that bad if I didn't have a giant crush on her. I mean, if she was some 60-year-old lady I would just talk to her and we'd coexist. But when it comes to Ally, it's different. She makes me nervous, to be honest. She's so pretty, and sweet, and effortless, really. She's also great with Amanda. She's so cute when she's playing with Amanda.

I want to get to know her better. I do. I just don't really know how to. When I talk to her, I'm nervous like I'm sixteen and I'm talking to my high school crush. She has that effect on me.

She seems like she likes it here though. She loves being with Amanda, and she actually doesn't mind taking care of her. I can't tell what she thinks of me. She obviously doesn't hate my guts, but I don't know if she _likes_ me much. She's kind of quiet.

I'm watching TV when Ally comes into the living room. "Hey," she greets softly, sitting down in a chair.

"Hi," I respond, "what's up?"

She shifts a little. I can tell that she wants to say something. "I need to ask a little favor of you," she says quietly.

"Sure, anything," I reply with an encouraging tone.

She smiles appreciatively. "Well since I'm living here now, I'm selling my dad's house, and I kinda wanted someone to help me clean it out. Especially in my parent's old room..." she explains softly.

I nod knowingly. "I'd be glad to help, Ally. Do you want to go tomorrow?" I ask.

She nods. "Yeah, I was hoping tomorrow would be good, because neither of us are working in the afternoon," she replies.

I smile. "Good. Well I'm available whenever you need me," I offer.

"Thanks," she responds. A beat passes. "Well Amanda's in bed, and it's getting late, I'm going to go take a shower. Goodnight, Austin."

I smile. "Night, Ally." I watch her as she walks away, learning her timid gate, her long, lean legs, the way her curls bounce hempenly behind her.

Yes, I really must get to know this girl.


	3. Bad Boyfriend

**A/N: Losing encouragement already. Fun. **

**Trying to get more stuff together but honestly I have ideas and no idea how to execute them. I'm just not talented I guess? Whatever. Have fun reading. Reviews would be lovely. I need to know you guys are out there :(**

* * *

We didn't really think about the fact that since both of us would be at Ally's old house, we'd have to bring Amanda. But it's not really a problem. It's good practice for us, taking her out. It's so much work though. The car seat, the carrier, the diaper bag, food. Babies in general are a lot of work, as Ally and I are quickly finding out.

We take my car because it's an SUV, and we plan on taking the rest of Ally's stuff over to my house. It's weird, but when I was working the morning rush at the Melody Diner, I was really excited for this. I guess I'm just excited to hang out with Ally.

"Did you get Amanda's diaper bag ready?" she asks as she flies out to the car. I nod and hold up the bag.

"All ready to go. Relax, she'll be fine," I assure her. She sighs.

"I know, I know, I just don't want to forget anything," she explains, climbing into the passenger's seat. I smile at her. She's so cute when she's flustered.

"You're going to have to give me directions, because I'm not sure where your old house is," I remind her as I back out of the driveway.

Ally is looking at her phone. "Yeah, just get out onto the main street and take a left," she instructs.

I do as she says. "Texting Dallas?" I ask, making conversation.

She looks a little bit taken a back. "Yeah, I am," she responds.

I inhale. I want to know more about her and Dallas, but I don't really know the right questions to ask. "Do you guys talk and see each other a lot?" I immediately feel stupid for asking that. They're _dating_, of course they talk a lot.

To my surprise, she shakes her head. "Kind of, but not as much as we used to. Not as much as I'd like." A second of silence. "Turn left up here."

"What's your relationship like?" I ask. A little nosey - okay, pretty nosey - but I want to know.

She squints her eyes a little, like she's thinking. "Well he's four years older than me, and it's...it's just kind of complicated. I mean, we love each other, but differently. We want different things. Left turn up here."

She sounds so sad when she talks about Dallas. So hopeless. "That sucks," I say, because I'm not really sure how to reply to that. She nods.

"A little. I'm still hopeful, though. Things could change. Turn right up here, and it's the stone house on the corner." She points out a two-story tan-colored house with pink azalea bushes lining the stone porch. It's a cute house, very homey looking. There's a 'For Sale' sign in the front yard.

"It's a beautiful house," I remark. She smiles.

"Thanks," she breathes. I park the car and she hops out to go get Amanda from the backseat.

We walk into the house, and the first thing I notice is that it smells like her. You know how every house has its own specific smell? Ally's house smells like sheets and flowers and vanilla and fresh towels.

"We'll go to my room first, I need to grab some things," she explains. She has Amanda's carrier in one arm and some collapsed cardboard boxes in the other.

"Okay," I agree. We go up to her room and she puts Amanda on the bed in her carrier to relax and sleep.

We talk about our jobs while we pack up the objects remaining in her room. Apparently the music store she works at, Sonic Boom, was her dad's business that she took over. She has two other employees but she owns the place. She teaches a lot of music lessons but she also sells instruments.

"That sounds like an awesome job," I muse, "so what instruments do you play?"

She blushes and her posture scrunches down a little, like she's trying to hide. "A lot, I mean, I've always loved music. Piano, guitar, bass, flute, oboe, drums, trumpet...and I sing," she responds.

I smile. She's talented, too. Of course. "What's your favorite?" I ask, boxing up a dresser drawer full of clothes.

"Piano," she replies, "and singing. Doing both together is awesome, I love it."

I nod. "Yeah, I was a musician. I still am. Piano, guitar, and singing. I get to sing everyday at my job, which is great. Do you ever perform?" I ask.

She shakes her head fervently. "No, not at all. I have horrific stage fright," she admits.

"Really?" I ask incredulously.

She nods sheepishly. "Yeah, ever since I was a teenager, I just hate performing. I get way too nervous."

I sigh. "That's a shame. I'm sure you have a great voice and amazing piano skills," I remark. She shrugs off my compliment and shakes her head, but I can see that she's smiling genuinely.

"Do you want to go pack up my dad's room a little?" she asks quietly. I nod, and we leave her room.

As soon as we get into her dad's old room, Ally changes. She's silent. Her eyes well with tears. In a tornado of bravery, I reach over and squeeze her hand. She looks up at me and smiles.

"I'll work on taking the bed apart if you do the closet?" I propose.

"Sure," she agrees, and we get to work.

We're cleaning for about twenty minutes before there's a sharp knock at the door. Ally runs downstairs to get it. I hear a door click open, then a low male voice. I stop rustling with the bedsheets and walk out into the hallway to listen. I hear Ally's voice first.

"Dallas, I'm sorry, I promise nothing is going on-"

"What do you mean nothing is going on?! You're living with a guy I don't know!"

"I couldn't afford to stay in this house, I'm practically out of money!"

"Don't give me that bullshit-"

"I'm taking care of his baby sister, Dallas, I'm a live-in nanny for him! Please calm down!"

"He's here, isn't he?"

"Dallas-"

"Don't lie to me, I heard him upstairs!"

"Dallas stop-"

I hear footsteps pounding upstairs and I'm caught like a deer in headlights in the middle of the hallway as Dallas approaches. I get a good look at him. He's tall, a giant compared to petite Ally. He's tan with dark hair and a scowling face. He has a lit cigarette in his hand and I can smell smoke from ten feet away.

"Are you the punk that's trying to get with my girlfriend?" Dallas demands. Why the hell is Ally with this guy?

"Woah, man, I'm not trying to get with her," I insist, holding my hands up.

Dallas shakes his head. "You want to explain why you're in her house right now?"

Ally butts in. "I told you, Dallas, he's helping me pack up the house," she explains softly. How is she so calm when her boyfriend's raging?

Dallas looks me up and down one more time challengingly. "Watch yourself," he spits.

And with that he stomps down the stairs and slams the front door behind him.

I don't know what to say. Apologize? Comfort her?

"Is...is he always this mean?" I ask as gently as I can.

She shakes her head initially, then changes her mind. "Sometimes," she croaks as her eyes fill with tears. She looks so sad, innocent, hopeless. I hate Dallas.

"Here, you're okay," I whisper. I put my hand on her back, trying to comfort her. She leans into me a little bit. I get an idea.

"C'mere," I whisper, taking her hand and leading her back into her former room. Amanda is in her carrier on the bed, grabbing her feet and looking around. I take the baby out of her carrier and sit on the edge of the bed, inviting Ally to join me.

"Here," I say to Ally, "hold Amanda. You'll feel better. Cuddling a cute baby makes everyone feel better," I remark encouragingly, transporting Amanda into Ally's frail arms.

Ally sighs, still looking upset. She looks down at Amanda, who has her thumb in her mouth. Amanda smiles up at her nanny. Ally gently smiles back. "You're right, I feel a little better," she admits.

I grin. Now because of Dallas' very cautionary warning, I'm sitting a good foot and a half away from Ally. Ally looks over at this distance and shifts a little.

"You know, you don't have to sit so far away from me," she invites timidly.

My eyes widen incredulously. "I don't want your boyfriend hunting me down," I remind her.

She shakes her head. "Don't worry about him," she says assuringly. I carefully move towards her, slipping my arm around her wait. A brunette curl tickles my face and I smile.

Amanda coos and shifts closer to Ally, gripping a lock of her hair. Ally leans down and kisses the baby's chubby little cheek, causing her to giggle.

"You're so adorable with her," I muse with a soft grin. She looks over at me with a smile.

"Don't let Dallas get you worried, okay? He's harmless. No matter what happens, I'm really glad I'm living with you and Amanda," she assures genuinely.

My arms wrap around her, one around her waist and the other supporting Amanda. Her head rests gently in the crook of my neck and we both look down at the smiling baby. Just like a cheesy clip art of a man, wife, and child.

"I'm glad too," I respond breathlessly.

If _that's_ not an understatement.


	4. Conflict & Advice

I'm in the kitchen making lunch when I see Ally walk in. Amanda is in front of her, toddling on chubby little legs while Ally holds her arms.

"Look who's almost ready to walk!" Ally exclaims. Her smile is almost as precious as Amanda walking. I rush over and kneel down to Amanda's level.

"Look at you !" I say with a wide smile. Amanda looks at me and giggles. I scoop her up in my arms and give her a kiss. Ally smiles up at me.

"She did that all by herself, I held her arms and she stood up," Ally explains proudly. I grin down at Amanda and scoop her up in my arms, kissing her on the head.

"That's amazing," I muse softly. Amanda is giggling and chewing on her fingers. So adorable.

"Oh, and just so you know, I'm going out with Dallas in about half an hour," she explains casually as she opens the fridge.

I inhale deeply. "The same Dallas that made you cry when we went to go clean out your old house?" I ask. It comes out more pointed than I had intended.

Her eyes flicker around the room until they come to rest on a spot on the floor. "I just...you have to weigh you options sometimes, you know? Some things are too hard to deal with, so you have to just keep working around them," she explains slowly.

"That doesn't seem like any way to talk about the guy you're supposed to be in love with," I remark.

Her face narrows with anger. "Yeah, well what do you want me to do? I can only love a guy like him so much."

She storms out of the kitchen, leaving me alone with Amanda.

"Ally..." I call after her. She's in the hallway, and she turns around when she sees me come to find her.

"I'm sorry..." she croaks. "It's hard because I just...I don't know what to do anymore."

"Stand up to him. If you don't want to keep taking his shit, you shouldn't have to," I encourage.

She shakes her head. "It's not...that simple," she explains quietly. A beat passes. "Whatever," she breathes, "I need to go get ready."

And she disappears up the stairs.

* * *

My mind can't help but wander back to Ally while she's out with Dallas. She sounded so hopeless when we talked about him. I worry that she's getting abused, taken advantage of, used.

Why do I care so much? Ally isn't mine or anything. She's my nanny, my fucking _employee. _I shouldn't be so invested in her, and I certainly shouldn't be trying to break her and Dallas up.

Once Ally gets home, I need to leave right away to go work the dinner rush at the Melody Diner. I'm kind of glad that I don't get a chance to ask her how her date went. Work is a distraction from Ally, and I desperately need that.

At work, I'm not myself. My co-worker and good friend Cassidy notices this.

"Something on your mind, Blondie?" she asks, using her nickname for me.

I sigh. "There's a girl," I explain simply, and that seems like enough.

Cassidy shifts towards me. "Ouch. What's the deal with this girl?" she inquires.

"She has a boyfriend. A stupid, smoking, asshole boyfriend who I know doesn't treat her right."

Her face fall, pitying me. "Is this girl your friend?"

I bite my lip. "Kind of. She's my roommate."

Cassidy's eyebrows shoot up a little. "Roommate, huh? so you see her a lot?"

I nod. "Yeah, a lot."

Cassidy bites her lip, processing the details of my predicament. "You might just like her because it's convenient. Because you're living with her. Crushes can be situational. Have you ever liked someone just because they're _there_?"

I shift a little. "What do you mean?"

"Let's say you're...you're on a cruise, and you meet a cute girl and you start talking to her. You'll probably end up liking her at least a little. Whereas if you had jury duty with said girl, you'd be much less likely to fall in love with her, because of unromantic surrounding and situation. You're living with this girl and taking care of a baby with her. You might be falling for her just because you think you should, not because you actually connected with her." She twirls a lock of honey-blonde hair around the tip of her finger.

She has a point. "You're right. Thanks, Cassidy," I say.

She smiles. "No problem, Blondie. Best of luck to you," she wishes genuinely as she leaves to go bus a table.

But my smile falls as she leaves. because her theory isn't even _close_ to explaining how I felt about Ally.

Not at all.

* * *

As soon as I get home, I smell the cigarette smoke.

Ally is sitting in the living room watching TV, and Amanda is crawling around on the floor playing with her toys. "Hey," she greets hempenly, not looking away from the TV screen.

"Was Dallas here?" I ask sternly. _Now_ she looks.

"Just for a few minutes, he wanted to...check out the house," she says quietly.

I draw in a deep breath. "Did he get angry with you?" I'm cautious; I don't want her getting mad again the way she did earlier.

She shakes her head. "No, he was fine," she replies, her tone unconvincing. But I can tell she doesn't want to talk about it, so I let it go and head upstairs to the bathroom to take a shower.

I notice that the bathroom trash can is full of used tissues, and I decide that I'm going to get Ally out of that relationship at all costs. Not for me, but for her.

* * *

**A/N: I will be starting a new Auslly story once I find a name for it :O If you're interested in helping me name my new story, PM me and I'll send you a sample and you can send me name suggestions! Thanks for the help guys! :D**


	5. Katydids

Guardian Angel C5

It's Friday night, and Ally and I decided we'd end the week by staying up late and watching a movie. We decided on _I Love You Phillip Morris _(one of her favorites, but it's actually pretty good. It makes me think of Cassidy's 'situational romance' theory, and I think that anyone who falls in love in prison has fallen into something entirely real.)

"Can I ask you something?" Ally asks out of the blue while we're watching the movie.

"Sure," I reply, scooting closer to her on the couch.

She draws a deep breath and stares straight out at the TV. "How...how did your parents die?" she asks cautiously.

I sigh. It still hurts to talk about them, but I don't want to make her feel guilty for asking. "It was a car crash," I explain quietly, "they collided with a drunk driver. Swerved off the road, hit a tree headfirst at 50 miles and hour, and the other car slammed into the driver's side at about 80 miles. Everyone died - the drunk driver, my dad, my mom. It was...the worst things that's ever happened to me." My voice breaks there at the end, and she nods understandingly.

"Why did you decide to keep Amanda?" she asks softly.

"I guess it felt like the only thing I could do," I admit. "I mean, she's my sister. My blood. I love her. Now, she could've had a family. A nice couple who couldn't have kids. She might've even have a brother or a sister or a dog. But I didn't want that for Amanda. I didn't want to send her off with another family. Not if I could help it. I mean, I'm her big brother. I'm supposed to protect her. So I decided I was going to."

She smiles a little, like she totally, one-hundred-percent gets it.

"You're brave," she whispers, and I smile at this.

"I'd like to think so too," I respond. "A lot of the social workers and stuff were really surprised that I was so eager to take care of Amanda and be her guardian. Saying stuff about how teenagers get pregnant and get stuck being teen parents, but how I have a choice. But I knew what I wanted, you know? Regardless of anything."

She nods and shifts closer to me on the couch. "Yeah," she responds breathlessly.

I take a deep breath, trying to keep the tears in. "The worst part is...is that I couldn't _tell_ Amanda, you know? She had to find out for herself. She's still figuring it out. She still calls me 'dada' sometimes. She's a baby, she doesn't understand death. Our parents were all she knew, and they just disappeared, and it'll be years and years before she can understand why. That makes me so sad."

There are glassy tears in her eyes. "That's awful," she whispers silently, her voice cracking.

A beat passes. "How did your parents die?" I ask cautiously.

"My mom died when I was a kid. She was a zoologist and a researcher and she spent a lot of time on a site in the African jungle. She drank some contaminated water and got really sick. She died in a matter of weeks. Some really rare disease. And my dad...he was a little more complicated. He was really, really depressed. It had been going on and off since he was a teenager. It'd get really bad sometimes. and he'd just shut down. Turn the world off around him. It killed me; he was so smart and so happy sometimes, but other times it was awful just looking at him. He was suicidal, but he was taking medications and seeing a psychologist once a week, so I thought he was doing okay. But one day I came home, and he was gone. Just _gone. _No note or anything. I had no idea where he was. I thought someone broke in and took him away, a murder or something. A few days later, investigators found his car parked near the river, and they found his body in the river. There was a cinderblock tied to his foot. He did it himself. He drowned himself. There was one note, on the floor in his car. Just a three-by-five index card with the words 'don't worry about me' scribbled across it. And that was it."

My eyes are wide and teary. "Ally...I'm so sorry..." I whisper.

"It's okay," she answers reflexively. She looks down at the carpet for a second. "I...I hate that I never got to say goodbye to him, and that he never said goodbye to me. He just left me all by myself. That made me feel like the shittiest daughter on earth," she admits softly, tears rolling down her cheeks.

I move closer to her and wrap my arms around her small body. I feel her tears soaking my shirt, and I couldn't care less.

"He was sick, Ally. I'm sure he didn't want to leave you. You did everything you could," I assure her quietly. I feel her body convulse in a sob.

"I miss him," she whispers, "everything about him..."

I nod softly. "I know," I reply. She buries her face in my chest, and I pull her closer to me.

"C'mon, lay down with me," I whisper, laying down on the couch, and she lays next to me, carefully situating her head on my chest. She curls up around me.

"You smell good," she remarks quietly, and I place an absent kiss against the top of her head.

We lay in silence for a few minutes while she calms down, dries her tears. "Ally?" I ask.

"Hmm?" she responds. Her voice is sleepy and relaxed.

"When...when Dallas came over, earlier, when I was at work...what happened?" I asked slowly.

She sighs. "He just...yelled at me, I guess. Called me a whore for living with another man, called me incapable for running out of money, called me stupid for thinking I could get away with cheating on him." Her voice is so calm, it amazes me.

"Ally...Ally none of that is true..." I assure her, shifting slightly to look her in the eyes.

She shakes her head. "I know, it's okay. I know how to just...block him out," she responds.

"The used tissues in the bathroom tell a different story."

I watch her face fall a little at that. "You saw?" she asks in a voice just above a whisper.

I nod. "Yeah," I respond, exhaling.

She shakes her head. "I started crying, then Amanda started crying, because of the noise. And he didn't even care. It was awful," she admits.

"Ally...you have to stand up to him, okay? You're a great girl, you don't deserve that," I assure her.

She squeezes her eyes shut and shakes her head. "I know, I know, I just...I don't know how," she says.

I rub her back softly. "And that's okay, you don't have to know right now. But if he does something like that again, come to me, okay?"

"Okay," she promises. She takes a deep breath, and she's quiet for a while before she speaks again.

"Do you hear the katydids?" she asks. The window is open a few feet away, and it's late summer in Miami. I definitely hear them.

"Yeah," I whisper.

I feel her smile and curl up closer to me. "My dad used to say that the noise was the sound of the katydids arguing all night." She grins and chants "ka-ty-did, no-she-didn't, ka-ty-did, no-she-didn't," her whispers lined up with the shrill triplets of the katydids.

I smile softly. "Arguing all night, huh? " I ask incredulously.

She nods. "I think about that every time I hear katydids at night. It's nice. It reminds me of him," she remarks quietly.

I lean up just enough to catch a glance at the clock. It's almost two in the morning. "C'mon, Ally, we better get to sleep," I muse.

She smiles. "Goodnight, Austin. Thanks for listening."

"Goodnight," I whisper.

And just like that, we're off.


	6. Stinging

Amanda sleeps through the night.

She's a light sleeper, so for her, making it through the whole night is a big accomplishment. That's the first thing I notice when I wake up on the couch snuggled up next to Ally.

Well, one of the first things.

She's still asleep. Pale eyelids stretch over tired eyes, and I notice that her pink lips are parted ever so slightly. Her hair is a little mussed up from sleeping, but it's cute, and her cheeks are a little bit rosy. Her steady breathing centers my thoughts.

_I should probably go check on Amanda, _I think to myself. But I really, really don't want to get up...

Ally stirs awake. She inhales and places her hand over her mouth as she yawns. Her brown eyes crack open.

"Good morning," I whisper with a smile. She grins back at me.

"Morning," she croaks in a tired voice.

"Sleep well?" I ask, bravely pulling her on top of me.

She giggles. "Slept great, you?" she questions softly.

"Yeah," I respond, my voice cracking with sleep, "great."

She looks up at me and smiles. "Glad to hear it," she says, and for the briefest second I want to plant an instinctive kiss on her lips. But then I realize that we've already gone way too far. It fully hits me that I let my nanny sleep in my arms.

Fuck.

She gives me one last little squeeze before making her way out of my arms and standing up. She stretches, and I don't know the last time I've ever seen someone so fucking adorable.

"Do you want me to go see how Amanda is?" she asks.

"Yeah, that'd be great," I breathe. She smiles and turns to leave.

As soon as she disappears upstairs, I let out a heavy sigh and bury my face in my hands. Allyson Dawson will be the literal death of me.

* * *

Ally disappears off to work around noon. I'm on my own to feed Amanda lunch. I open her a box of baby food, oatmeal cereal with apple and sweet potato. Baby food is so nasty.

"Aah-dah," Amanda coos. Of course, being 7 months old, she can't pronounce 'Austin,' but her version is adorable.

"That's right," I affirm with a smile. I put on some cartoons for her to watch while I feed her. She coos and giggles as I feed her. She's such a cute baby.

I think she's starting to forget about Mom and Dad, and my feeling about that are extremely mixed. It's good that she doesn't cry asking for Mom anymore, but at the same time, it's probably the worst thing I've ever seen. She won't remember her parents at all when she grows up. That thought keeps me up every night.

She'll never have what I had: our amazing parents. Amanda will never get to go to a father-daughter dance with her dad. Her mom will never be her Girl Scout troop leader. There are too many gaps I can't fill. Because when people die, it's not what they take, but what they leave behind that kills us. Gaps.

Amanda's full, so I burp her and play with her on the floor for a while. Ally got her some new toys that she really likes.

My mind drifts to Dallas. How can I get her to see that she can't possibly stay with him? I feel like somehow, sleeping in my arms helped. I know Dallas would never do anything like that for her. And she seemed to enjoy it. I will never forget the little smile on her face when she woke up and realized where she was.

All I want is for her to be happy. And I know she's not happy with him.

That's not so wrong.

Right?

* * *

"Hey," Ally greets as she returns home from work. She shakes the rain off her coat and hangs it up by the door. It's pouring in Miami, a rare occasion.

"Hey," I reply. I walk over to her. "How was work?"

"It was fine," she responds with a small smile.

"Good," I breathe. I carefully place my hand on her shoulder. She smiles and gives me a timid hug. I beam.

"I was gonna take Amanda out for a walk," she says in passing as she takes off her trench coat.

I look out the window, then incredulously at her. "Ally, it's pouring" I laugh.

She shakes her head. "It's just a drizzle, we'll be fine," she assures me casually. She grabs the stroller to get it ready.

"Ally, why would you take a 7-month-old baby out into the rain if you didn't have to?" I interrogate.

She frowns. "It's good for her to get outside," she retorts.

I shake my head. "I don't want Amanda to catch a cold." I raise my voice a little.

She stops fussing with the stroller and looks at me. "It's rain, Austin, not battery acid. I'll be fine."

I sigh. "Fine, do whatever you want with _my_ sister," I spit. I regret it immediately.

She looks at me in horror. "I'm sorry," she snarls, her voice dripping in mean sarcasm, "I didn't know I needed your permission to do you a favor!"

"You can do me favors as long as they aren't totally irrational!" I shout.

"You're the one being fucking irrational!" she yells back.

My fists ball up when I hear her swear. "Ally-"

"Fine, whatever, take Amanda for a walk your goddamn self," she spits. She grabs her keys.

I hear the engine start and her tire screech as she peels out of the driveway.

_Fuck. _

* * *

I wait for her. I try not to think about it. I tell myself that she just needs time to cool down. I play with Amanda, I make some pasta, I even read the newspaper a little. But I can't stop feeling awful about Ally.

She comes home about two hours later. It's not raining anymore. I read her face as she comes in, and she looks apologetic.

"Hi," I say carefully, testing the waters.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. She walks over and wraps her arms around me.

I definitely didn't expect that. I pull her tighter up against me. "I'm sorry too," I mumble into her brown curls. My hands moves up to the back of her head, and I play with her hair. I feel her press a chaste kiss into the crook of my neck.

"Where did you go?" I ask softly.

"I...I drove around for a while, then I went to Dallas'...I don't know why though, because it made me feel terrible," she explains. She's still clinging to me. She feels so small in my arms.

"What happened there?" I ask carefully.

She exhales gently. "More...fighting, and screaming, and arguing..." she admits.

I bit my lip and release a sympathetic sigh. "Ally..." I whisper. I put my hand on her back and pull her closer to me, and she winces.

I pull away. I was hardly putting pressure on her. It shouldn't have hurt her, let alone cause her to wince. Unless...

"Ally, let me see your back," I request softly.

"Austin, please, no, it's nothing..." she insists, but I don't buy it.

"Let me see what he did to you," I demand a little more forcefully this time.

Her face falls and she turns around, lifting the bottom hem of her shirt. There's a bruise in the middle of her lower back about the size of a hand, as well as a cut maybe two inches long. My mouth falls open.

"Ally..." I whisper.

"I know, I..." Her voice cracks in a weak sob.

I turn her around and wrap my arms around her, careful not to press my hand into her back too hard. I take her hand and gently lead her to the bathroom. I grab a cotton ball and some hydrogen peroxide.

"This might sting a little," I warn. She nods and exposes her wounds for me. I wince again looking at it. I wet the cotton ball with hydrogen peroxide and gently dab at the red gash at the epicenter of the bruise. She flinches slightly.

When I'm done, I lean down and press a gentle kiss against one end of the cut. I continue trace my lips along the length of the gash, kissing very softly. I close my eyes as my lips reach the end of the laceration and exhale softly. Goosebumps emerge from her skin as my breath hits her.

"Are you gonna be okay, Ally?" I ask softly, standing back up and facing her. She nervously tucks a brunette curl behind her ear.

"Yeah," she croaks unconvincingly.

"You should really break up with him," I say.

She hangs her head and nods a little. She knows, and I hope she really gets it, that she needs to take care of herself now. Dallas is never going to make her anything but miserable.

"Is Amanda asleep?" she asks.

"Yeah, I just put her down a little bit ago," I breathe.

She's silent for a second. "I, um, I'm gonna take a shower and get to bed," she replies. She turns to leave, but turns back for a second.

"Thank you," she mutters.

She's gone before I can reply, but I know what I wanted to say.

_No, thank you..._


	7. Sober

**A/N: imsorryimsorryimsorry**

* * *

I don't drink. I really don't. I shouldn't, because I'm only 19. But sometimes I need to, and tonight is one of those nights. I tell Ally that I won't be back until really late and she seems okay with it. She lets me hug her goodbye, and I kiss her head lightly.

I'm going to a party with Cassidy and some of her friends. She's 22, and while she's not an alcoholic or anything, she does like to drink more than once in a while. She's very social and drinks with her friends I guess.

I pull up to this house and park on the grass. I can hear music blasting. I pop an Altoid into my mouth, fix my hair, and walk in.

I spot a few guys I know from work and shoot the shit with them for a while. I excuse myself to go get a drink and push my way through the crowded house, greeting people I know. Not that there's many. I don't tend to hang out with Cassidy's crowd. I get some beer and wander around for a while before I find Cassidy. She's standing in the living room, surrounded by guys.

"Austin!" she exclaims as she sees me. She stumbles towards me and wraps in me in a very forward embrace.

"Hey Cassidy," I greet her. My eyes fall to sneak a quick glance down her body, her short gray dress and her tall black heels. Cassidy is beautiful, that much I'll admit.

"Enjoying the party?" she giggles.

I nod slowly. "Yeah, you seem to be enjoying it too," I muse a little sarcastically. She laughs.

"Hey," she interjects, "come with me, I want to show you something." She grabs my hand and leads me up crowded stairs to the second floor of the house. I have an idea where this is headed. I stare at Cassidy a little as she walks up the stairs. Cassidy's pretty, sure - that's no secret. But I've never actually considered the possibility of _sleeping _with her.

We end up in a guest bedroom-looking room. It's plain and empty. Cassidy is grinning drunkenly as she sits down on the edge of the bed, throwing her long bare legs around a little for me.

"Cassidy..." I scold quietly. She giggles at me drunkly.

"Come _on_, Austin," she slurs. Her full pink lips pout a little.

I draw in a deep breath. "Cassidy," I command, but it comes out as more of a grunt.

Her eyebrows shoot up and she smiles. "What was that?" she asks, feigning innocence as her dress slides up her thigh.

"Don't do this," I beg softly. This only fuels her fire. She grins and lays down on the bed, feeling around on the bed beneath her. She's a little graceful, almost, as she's rolling around a stranger's bed, inviting me in.

The music stops. The lights come up. The walls close in. Suddenly I realize where I am and what I'm doing. Cassidy's enticing, but she's drunk. And I'm not so sober either. I can't do this. Hell, I don't even _want_ to do this. I don't want to hook up with Cassidy.

"Cassidy, I don't want to do this," I blurt, rushing out of the room before I change my mind. I don't get to see the deer-in-headlights look on her dear, bedlight face because I'm a leather jacket in a crowded room, sprinting down stairs and past faceless people and props. I find my car on the lawn and you'd think there was a monster chasing me, the way I was running, but you can't outrun yourself. I turn up music to drown out my thoughts, but you can't drown out yourself. And as I'm driving, all I can think about is Ally, and how I don't want anyone but Ally, and that is an absolute catastrophe.


End file.
